I admitted to my college roommate S. last night that I’m having a hard time getting into the spirit of the season. She looked at me and said, “I think it’s going around.” There is something about this year that is difficult. I don’t know if it’s because the onslaught of buy-buy-buy seemed even more…pressure filled than usual, I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t heard enough good Christmas music and every store insists on playing Santa Baby because that makes me inclined to buy stuff for selfish people, but for some reason, the spirit is lacking this year. Maybe it’s because we’re all adults and none of us have children to remind us about the magic of the season.
I tried, really hard, to take a step back, to remind myself that rejoicing in the lights and the festive spirit is what this holiday is about for me, but even that isn’t helping. Assembly of the Disney tree at work (we have a Finding Nemo ornament!) didn’t really help. The Nosy Bitches exchange has been super fun but I kind of botched my gift and it was sort of frustrating and my person hasn’t gotten their gift yet so I’m still stressing about it not being good enough.
Listening to Christmas Wrapping is helping a little bit. Our local indie radio station has been playing some really good holiday music, including Deep Blue Something’s Little Drummer Boy and a few others I really liked, so that has been helpful at making me feel holiday-y.
I’m not really sure the answer to my holiday ennui, but I have Finished Shopping. Anything I forgot to get for anybody, they just aren’t getting. Anything I need to return is waiting until January. Between now and The Christmases (it’s five nights/days of celebration), I can spend some time relaxing, going to Solstice Services, wrapping gifts, and making a few last minute handmade things. Wait, our holiday cards haven’t arrived yet and I need to get them out ASAP? Wait, my in-laws are coming to stay? Oh, what’s that you say, we don’t have anything for dinner? What’s that, I volunteered to make a cheesecake for Christmas? Sigh. It’s really hard to get into the Holiday spirit when you have a to-do list a mile long. Anyone else having trouble?